Hi, I’m Ben Behrouzi, and you should probably get the popcorn right now.  And don’t forget the butter.  Below are the most recent and most fashionable rumors about me online.  I try to update the list as frequently as possible but I may be a bit behind, so I do apologize in advance.

As you may already know its a brave new world out there with web 2.0.  Not only has web 2.0 given life to constructive user generated content, which is why we Love it by the way, but it has also given life to anyone with a keyboard with a lot of free time on their hands aiming to get some darn good old fashioned attention.  Here are some examples :

Google Sucks. Do a Google on “Google Sucks” and you’ll find all sorts of neat “journalism” and goodies.  So does Google suck?  I don’t think so.  Should you stop using Google?  This ones a tough one, moving on…

Steve Jobs Heart Attack Rumor. Just recently someone special posted that Steve Jobs had a heart attack.  As a result Apple took a 10% stock price plunge that day…  So did he really have a heart attack?  No.  Did he have an anxiety attack?  No.  Was there any uncomfortably in the chest area?  No.  How about after the stock plunge?  Probably.  Where is the trigger happy guy with the keyboard now?  Probably in timeout.

So what’s the point?  The point is, as in the real world, the Internet has the tabloids, TMZ and bums too.  Enjoy…

Ben Behrouzi And The Most Fashionable Rumors Online

Rumor # 1 :  Ben Behrouzi Was Fired From One of The Companies he Co-Founded, Reply! (Reply.com)

Nothing like the scent of lies and propaganda in the morning.

False. I co-founded Reply! at the age of 20 and lead the development of technology and products over the course of 6 years.  As scheduled, I phased out of operations at the close of 2006 to expand from lead generation and build new Internet Companies.  I remain as one of the largest shareholders and supporters of my company.  Unfortunately, I have been the recipient of a substantial number of ongoing smears since I left.

The individual that was the “source” of this rumor was fired a long time ago before I left for use and abuse of alcohol on the job.

Rumor # 2 :  Ben Behrouzi is a Bully and Dislikes Bloggers

False.  I love bloggers.  In fact one of our divisions, iHype.com, pays bloggers to write about new products and services online.  What I do despise are blogmobsters and those that use blogs as a means to bully others.  “Freeze! Or I’ll Blog About You” is the juvenile threat that comes to mind while they hide behind the banner of “We are exercising our free speech rights”.  Actually you’re committing defamation.

Here some of the top blog mobster personas documented by our expert friend in defamation law :  http://www.cybertriallawyer.com/defamation-lawyers

Rumor # 3 :  Ben Behrouzi Regretfully Left an Ugly Voicemail

With regret, the voicemail is true.  I was 22 or 23 with an immense amount of pressure from bankers, investors and our operations, and probably too much testosterone.  However, the context is false.

Rogue engineers and blog mobsters alike tend to tell you only a fraction of the story.  The engineer in that call had intoxicated himself with alcohol on the job, sabotaged the live production environment, stolen $200k in tech equipment and never returned a call from his 4 managers.  After 2 kind calls from me and the local authorities at his home, he finally responded to my angry message.

Nevertheless, I apologized to him when we recovered the equipment and went so far as helping him enroll into AA with a chance at rehire if he were to demonstrate recovery.  2 – 3 years later he went on a smearing campaign against me even though I was arguably the most helpful employer and friend he had in the work world.  About 1 year ago this young genius level systems engineer died from liver failure due to alcohol abuse.

Rumor # 4 :  Ben Behrouzi Sued a Blogger to Stop His Free Speech

False.  We sued not a blogger, but a single individual, who was seriously defaming our company to get attention for himself.  This individual began by calling our products a scam and by defaming me personally on his websites.  Every email I sent him to understand why he was attacking us was posted online with a spin to gain more and more attention.  He went so far as accusing our firm of having posted disgusting messages online about him.  I worked to get us on a phone call, our legal team worked to engage him in a dialog, all to no avail.  He continued to portray himself as a victim while attacking our company and people simultaneously.  I was left no option but to sue.  The case was reviewed by both lawyers, the individual’s response was heard and without getting into the details of the settlement, the individual posted a letter of retraction.

Take a look at a different case and the reality of this problem facing the legal system :  http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2006-10-10-internet-defamation-case_x.htm

Rumor # 5 :  Ben Behrouzi is Against Free Speech

False.  Actually, I am a strong proponent of responsible free speech, but I am against the hijacking of this great right to attack others via blogs.  I’ve been attacked, harassed, stalked, threatened and much more all over the Internet under the banner of “Free Speech.”

Rumor # 6 :  Ben Behrouzi Has Sex With His Mother and Has a Sexual Fascination For Small Monkeys.

False. I know its crazy, but believe it or not somebody has posted this accusation online.  Can anyone say Freudian slip?

Rumor # 7 :  Ben Behrouzi is a Spammer And Supports Shill Comments Online

False. We don’t tolerate SPAM and just because an employee enjoys and supports where they work and communicates those feelings online does not mean a company promotes SPAM or shill comments. But we’ve put in some serious measures for these ridiculous critics.  Every single day we beat the sales force with bamboo sticks and have them listen to very depressing music so that they never write anything positive about where they work.  Ever.  Sometimes we do get a fast and loose one, but we stick them in the basement with a red stapler almost immediately.

Rumor # 8 :  Ben Behrouzi is a Meany.

If you are against the notion that owning a keyboard must precede with a license, then yes I’m a meany.

Rumor # 9 :  Ben Behrouzi Engages in Cyber-squatting.

False. But I have purchased domains that are of interest to me.

Rumor # 10 :  Ben Behrouzi And Company are Greedy

If by greedy we mean that our companies have produced hundreds of new jobs, killer health and dental benefits, given hundreds of thousands of dollars back to communities, hosted awesome ping pong tournaments all while building great services, then yes we are greedy.

Rumor # 11 :  Ben Behrouzi Plays Ping Pong All Day Instead of Putting Investor Money to Work.

False. We play ping pong all day and all night.

Rumor # 12 :  Ben Behrouzi And Company Are in The Business of Click Fraud.

“A click click here, a click click there, here a click, there a click, everywhere a click click.” This is our motto and in fact this is what we chant at Monday morning meetings every week.  And actually, we are thinking of releasing a Christmas CD this year!  We’re very excited.

When you have a large sale force, sometimes you get some loose canons.  But in no way shape or form does the act of one individual suggest that the entire company supports, endorses and promotes such silly activity.  But there is no point for the tabloids to point that out, it wouldn’t sell!  Sing with me..